How to help your kids feel back-to-school ready

Kids are headed back to school.

That means earlier bedtimes, homework time, and adjusting screen time rhythms (easier said than done).

But the way we help our kids transition from summer to school when it comes to screens makes a big impact on their first week back.

In today’s newsletter:

The start of the school year comes with a lot of big changes for families.

The number of simultaneous commitments starts to stack up. Social dynamics from school start coming home again with your kids. In many ways the whole household gets busier.

But if you’re like most families, one of the big changes that also needs to happen is a change from how screen time worked in the summer to how it will work during the school year.

Setting up healthy screen rhythms before the new school year is ultimately an investment in your child’s success—both socially and academically.

A well-rested kid who’s ready and excited to go to school (because they haven’t been overindulging on screen time) will be better positioned to make new friendships, and do well in class.

But if your kid suddenly jumps back into a phone-free environment (like most schools in my area) after a screen-heavy summer, they’ll likely experience some dopamine withdrawals the first few weeks, making them low energy, grumpy, and distracted.

That makes all of this is much harder.

Here are four things to keep in mind as you manage your family’s summer-to-school screen time reset.

Phones are the #1 disruptor of getting a healthy amount of sleep, which is crucial in the transition back to school.

If the bedtime routine is an issue for your family, go in together on a family screen cutoff time, early enough in the evening so a good night of sleep becomes more likely.

Buy alarm clocks if you haven’t already.

It’s human nature for impending restrictions to make someone want to binge. But that only makes it harder when the full reset has to happen.

So start now. Reintroduce screen time rules at least a week, or a few days, before the return to school.

This can make the transition easier.

Part of making this transition involves finding something to replace the large amounts of screen time that the summer may have enabled.

So replace the screen time with something real. Take your kid out to grab some ice cream, or Starbucks, just a walk even.

The week before the school year starts can provide a great time to start asking your kid what they hope the next year will be like. For example, what’s one thing they hope changes from last year, and what’s one thing they hope stays the same? And then, what could they do to make that more likely?

The sociologist Brené Brown once wrote, “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.”

Let your kids know exactly what the screen time expectations are going to be, and what happens if they do or don’t follow them. Then follow through. Even if you need to remind them of the new expectations more than a couple of times.

There’s a good chance your kids aren’t going to love this, especially at first. But that’s okay. That ‘s a normal reaction.

The Christian writer G.K. Chesterton once wrote that the main purpose of boundaries was to “give room for good things to run wild.” So as your family prepares to return to its school year rhythms, remember that your goal is not just to shut your kids down.

What you’re really doing here is trying to set them up to have the best year that they possibly can.

Kids can be surprisingly cooperative when we’re able to give them a compelling why behind the rules—and when they see us modeling the same healthy habits.

Hope you enjoy getting back to school!

Most parenting advice on screens falls into two camps: total ban or total surrender. Neither actually helps.

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